Of dating apps and bad decisions

With technology and dating apps, I cannot help but to be slightly intrigued as to how these apps work and whether or not they can be successful. So, like every other single girl, I did just that. I installed Happn and used it.

I've had several dates, several drinks, several laughs and several heart breaks. It's just the usual desl that comes along with dating.

However, in this dating process (or game as some could call it), I realised something that I never would have realised had it not happened to me at the very time that it did. This allowed me to compare, at the same time, two guys of completely different personalities and where I stand in the picture.

One of my earlier dates was with a very charming guy. Mr Charming just knew the right thing to say and it was always what I wanted to hear. But Mr Charming never had the time for me and everytime we met, it always involved alcohol. A few weeks later, things ended. I went on a short vacation and I reached out to him again, not because I couldn't get over him, but because I just wanted to know why things ended. Eventually, I will learn the hard way that some people can never be honest. Then we dated again and a few weeks later things ended. Surprise... not! 

Around the second time I contacted Mr Charming, along came Mr Architect. He didn't check my boxes (we're talking physical attraction here. Let's be honest, the very first thing that attracts us to another is their physical appearance.) but he was caring. He did get a little pushy and when that happened, just like two magnets of the same polarity, I started moving in the opposite direction. 

This brings us to the age old question - why are we attracted to people who hurt us but never to the ones who are nice to us?

I still have no answer for that, but I did learn several things:

• If a guy doesn't make the effort to call you/ talk to you/ listen to you/ tell you about his day etc, he is not interested in you.
• If he is not interested in you, there is nothing you can do to make him interested in you.
• If he makes excuses saying you're not ready to be in a relationship, he is really talking about himself, but using you as an excuse.
• If a guy is too pushy, learn to give yourself some space instead of freaking out and just running away.
• If someone doesn't check your boxes right away, give him a chance anyway. Better a kind guy than an asshole any day!

If any of you have any interesting experiences on Happn, please share with me. :)

Learning about love,

Halley